At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
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she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
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