I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
This beer is not sobering me up at all
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
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