Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
When a guy asks for your ig but you already know his blood type, social security number, & mother's maiden name.
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
Randomize