I cheated on you last night. I slept with my laptop.
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
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just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
I told him you're making deviled eggs for the party. Sisters make deviled eggs to get their sisters laid. It's science.
If people had ratings on Tinder I'd give you 5 out of 5 stars.
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
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