And I just remember seeing him for the first time and being like, who is this ape of a man? Like legit he could be the missing link
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
You may now shotgun with the bride
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
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