lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
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I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
I take back everything I said about communal showers
He goes "sorry was at the gym. Some of us workout " and I wanted to text him back and go "well some of us do occasional drugs so we don't have to"
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I make one hell of a fire on Ambien. Other life choices not so much. But fire. Fire I can do.
Just to be clear, the only reason you're allowed to scream "COCKTAIL SERVANT" at bartenders is because you have nice tits
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
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