Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
you googled " I want to buy a live ostrich". I'd say you were pretty wasted.
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It takes a special kind of Adderall to make me go to the hardware store, buy paint, and paint tiny polka-dots on all four of my bedroom walls.
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
Randomize