Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
I just found my "random bang list for summer of 2012" that I wrote last night.. It's written on a Plan B receipt. If this isn't irony I don't know what is.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
These are the things that make me so grateful... that I slept with your sister instead.
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
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