don't thank me. stop putting your penis in foreign objects.
we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
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