Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
I don't know what's worse....that fact that my dog ate my vibrator or that he later puked it up on my bed
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
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It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
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