Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
captain morgan taught me last night that resee's puffs are way better when eaten straight out of the sink.
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
I just found the gloves and lightbulb I stole. Did you pee on a ATM inside a bank?
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
I'm so poor. I just wiped my ass with cocktail napkins... That I stole from the neighbors... When I was over there stealing Cheetos.
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
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