I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
you left your dildo in my car
rules of finders keepers apply
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
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dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
We talked him into tasing himself.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize