if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
The moment when you go to plug in someone else's phone in your car and your lube is in the way. Don't mind that it's just my center console car lube. Normal.
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
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