Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last night I texted her to confirm she could start designing costumes for my show this week.
That is one convoluted booty call.
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
He? As in you personified your dick?
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
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