he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
drunk doesn't even begin to explain it. dude called him and said to bring you back because he'd already called dibs.
I feel like my lungs want to punch me in the vagina.
is that even a sentence?
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
I'm surprised, it's been so long you must be starving
At a certain point, the zombie-like hunger goes away. Then the sadness sets in. Then you start lying to yourself that you're taking some "me time." Then you remember you dodged chlamydia and Buddha knows what else. Then you're at peace with it.
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
Wanna go on a picnic?
... by picnic I mean wanna sit on a blanket and drink with me?
Randomize