Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
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And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
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He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
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