I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
I'd like to say he was whispering sweet nothings into my ear all night but really he was just whispering "pussyyy"
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
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