She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've been drinking vodka for the last 12 hours at the beach and can't see straight and have awesome hair.
LIFE IS #1 SOMETIMES
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
The FEDEX guy just cock blocked me by getting his van stuck in my driveway
OMG I accidentally abducted a cat. Now there is a cat in my apartment. I NEED TO UNDO WHAT I HAVE DONE
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
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