You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
My dick just stopped my iPhone from falling into the toilet.
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
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