Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
I murdered the dance floor call the cops
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
My neighbor caught me peeing on his rose bushes at 2 in the morning while wearing my Santa hat. My sex appeal has never been higher.
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
You told me you didn't want to go to the hospital because you were drunk, but because you didn't want to leave the "fun".
Randomize