awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
If I sit on the seam of my jeans just the right way when the bass hits, this might be my new favorite band.
i just walked into thanksgiving and three people in a row asked me who i was. really?
I'm reducing my diet to vodka and rice cakes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your cousin just asked the bartender to start a round of vagina shots. Not body shots. Vagina shots. We're taking her out more often.
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
It's no shave November. This is our time.
Today's psa: there are certain parts of your body you shouldn't scratch while wearing fake nails.
you just tore your cootch a new one, didn't you?
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
I don't think I'll get invited back. I drunkenly told her that her kids would be perfect for a pro-abortion campaign.
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