You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
why is it that no matter what your novelty license plate says it always screams "im a huge tool"?
I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize