Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
You tried to get the stranger on the sea bus to give you a bite of his chicken sub by repeating over and over "im in a girl band"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You filled up my voicemail with a slurred but graphic depiction of how you were humping a fire hydrant.
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
Drunk puking in my bathtub has plugged it up for the third time this year. I hate these calls to my landlord.
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
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