and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
It's alarming how good I'm getting at being productive at work on Thursday after Johnny Walker Wednesdays.
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
You refused to get in the cab so we rock paper scissored to decide who walked you home and the fat guy was it. So don't blame your poor hook-up choice on me; it was all you.
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
I fell asleep in my underwear on the deck. What the fuck.
This was the best text I've ever woken up to
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
I told my manager I was trying to conserve my energy for date night/Sexual Olympics later. That's legit for another break, right?
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
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