i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
I saw your purple underwear in the road this morning.
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
I think I'm still drunk...I just gave my empty conditioner bottle a break-up speech before I threw it away.
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
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