im so horny i just used my electric toothbrush to masturbate. god help me
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
imagine playing with puppies while we're drunk.
Like... we could film it and put like, "do you believe in magic" as the backround song and it would be complete joy.
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
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