dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
I'm pretty sure I have jizz on the back of the dress I wore to church. Awesome.
this girl and her friend just showed up at my house. standing together, theylook exactly like the number 10. this has cockblock written alllllll over it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
shape ups are the best shoes to wear when youre stoned. its like walking on little trampolines every step.
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
But theres a keg here and me gusta
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
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