I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
I'm at that stage of drunk where just imagining having sex makes me motion sick.
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