he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
I can't breathe out the right side of my face
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
I was so stoned last night I got into an argument with your voicemail message.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
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