its not stalking. its research.
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
apparently I crawled into someone's bed and demanded they call me 'big dog' before shotgunning a beer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
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