Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
Mixing coffee with vodka may have been a bad choice, I feel like I'm pregnant and the baby is trying to perform a c-section from the inside.
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
Randomize