um i just realized that some of the people at my family reunion look inbred. thats not a good sign.
hahaha beady eyes set close together? defs inbred.
my dads cousin just put a cig in his dogs mouth and says, "look its a commercial for newport!" holy hell i hope im adopted.
I am stoned and watching Pocahontas. I am letting the kids eat whatever they want. I am the best babysitter in the whole wide world
Just got a lapdance on the metro. She said she was on maternity leave and needed the practice.
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up spooning my guard tube. Tell me I'm not the most dedicated lifeguard ever
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
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