idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
We're too lazy to do dishes, so we're making sangria in a flower vase.
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
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