Well the candle wax mightve been sexy if he didn't drop the candle and light half my bed on fire
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You FaceTimed your mom in the back of the limo telling her how many guys you hooked up with at the concert
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
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