I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
So I thought I was doing pretty good and then I sneezed and prematurely ejaculated...
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
I was just trying to flirt with James Franco but she kept telling me to take shots out of Ron Burgundy's mouth
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
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