Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
I haven't been laid since Bush was president.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
The blonde cop looked at my license and told me I better have be home when her shift ends
I hate you
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