I think im going to throw up on grandma
Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I swear a good massage is the easiest way in my pants.
Not that there's a hard way... but you know what I mean.
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Some guy was coming onto me last night and in the middle of it all he said: 'It literally says this on my birth certificate: Francis Coburt: The Guy Who Can Pull Two Beers Outta His Pants Like Magic.'
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
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