great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
I wanna tell red shirt guy I'm pregnant and use the abortion money for Coachella.
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
I slipped on a piece of pizza last night and when the bouncer helped me up I told him the garbage can pushed me.
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
DONT TELL ME I CANT HAVE AN ENTIRE BOTTLE OF VODKA AT DINNER. IM AN ADULT. I PAY BILLS.
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
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