There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
She just texted me apologizing for taking selfies on my phone then asked me to send them to her
I tried to steal a Mike's Hard sign last night but it didn't work out
why what happened?
Well it was going fine.. until the bouncer noticed the three foot steel lemon sticking out of my jacket.
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
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