Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
May or may not have just lost a contact hanging out Anthony's sunroof. Drunk. Hint: I can only see out of one eye right now.
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
so you ordered business cards online last night with a picture of your dick on them. you need to hide that new credit card when you drink
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
I just found out my younger brother has me saved in his contacts as "Womb Primer" and I don't know what to do with this information
I was christened with Fireball shots by some guy at the bar. I'm practically Jesus now.
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
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