he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex
At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
where are my pants?
in the oven.
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