why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
apparently the officer said last night, "son, why don't you do yourself a favor and spread your legs so you don't keep vomiting on them". why can't I remember those nights?!
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
I realized today that the only things I'm guaranteed to have with me at all times are lipgloss, condoms and a USB drive. hmmm...
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
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