i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
Damn why is there no horse blowjob emoji?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
Can I trade you chipotle for a pregnancy test?
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
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