did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
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I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
You're not drunk til you wake your roommates up screaming at your ceiling fan
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Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
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