Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
When you only buy popcorn and condoms at the grocery store they know whats up.
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
you used progresso chicken soup as a mixer last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They should just send me home - I'm literally doing nothing but watching porn and listening to pandora.
I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
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