the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
I DONT HAVE A FUCKING JOB RIGHT NOW. DO YOU THINK I HAVE TIME TO WASTE GOING BACK AND FORTH WITH SOMEONE WHOS LYING, ABOUT LYING, AND JUST BEING A LIAR? HONESTLY, YES I DO HAVE TIME. BUT I HAVE A FUCKING LOT BETTER THINGS I COULD BE WASTING MY TIME DOING. LIKE ORGANIZING MY POKEMON CARD COLLECTION.
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
My one night stand asked me out to dinner. When he came to pick me up I got in the back seat. I thought he sent an uber. Awkward.
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
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