Texts From Last Night

SchoolBusFire's Favorites Texts:

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  (505): View more from New Mexico

  I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea

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  (505): I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea http://tfl.nu/734q
  Replies (7) Good night (1972) Bad night (774) Order T-Shirt
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  (708): View more from Illinois

  The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.

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  (708): The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind. http://tfl.nu/lim4
  Replies (5) Good night (771) Bad night (1505) Order T-Shirt
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  (+61): View more from Australia

  woke up this morning with a big mac and chips on a plate, coke in a glass and a knife and fork AND NAPKIN waiting for me in front of my computer. PORN WAS ALREADY PLAYING. I LOVE DRUNK ME

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  (+61): woke up this morning with a big mac and chips on a plate, coke in a glass and a knife and fork AND NAPKIN waiting for me in front of my computer. PORN WAS ALREADY PLAYING. I LOVE DRUNK ME http://tfl.nu/6fbk
  Replies (15) Good night (6122) Bad night (791)
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  (903): View more from Texas

  I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.

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  (903): I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish. http://tfl.nu/384h
  Replies (13) Good night (2355) Bad night (1050) Order T-Shirt
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  (330): View more from Ohio

  He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.

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  (330): He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses. http://tfl.nu/vaq0
  Replies (16) Good night (4060) Bad night (1059) Order T-Shirt
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  (770): View more from Georgia

  She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.

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  (770): She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out. http://tfl.nu/r137
  Replies (11) Good night (876) Bad night (2457) Order T-Shirt
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  (618): View more from Illinois

  Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.

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  (618): Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers. http://tfl.nu/lte3
  Replies (7) Good night (3026) Bad night (958) Order T-Shirt
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  (919): View more from North Carolina

  You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.

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  (919): You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad. http://tfl.nu/r24i
  Replies (12) Good night (1078) Bad night (2076) Order T-Shirt
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  (502): View more from Kentucky

  Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead

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  (502): Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead http://tfl.nu/4b2b
  Replies (18) Good night (5171) Bad night (1013) Order T-Shirt
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  (802): View more from Vermont

  Ask if he wants his tooth back. It's in the freezer. In the box of hotpockets.

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  (802): Ask if he wants his tooth back. It's in the freezer. In the box of hotpockets. http://tfl.nu/f9nv
  Replies (6) Good night (1152) Bad night (2422) Order T-Shirt
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  (443): View more from Maryland

  she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.

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  (443): she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates. http://tfl.nu/n2n2
  Replies (5) Good night (2182) Bad night (834) Order T-Shirt
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  (360): View more from Washington

  you inspire me to be a worse person

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  (360): you inspire me to be a worse person http://tfl.nu/en33
  Replies (6) Good night (3239) Bad night (1047) Order T-Shirt
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  (512): View more from Texas

  They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?

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  (512): They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true? http://tfl.nu/qtx2
  Replies (13) Good night (2477) Bad night (1247) Order T-Shirt
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  (917): View more from New York City

  level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.

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  (917): level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed. http://tfl.nu/i2kx
  Replies (25) Good night (3997) Bad night (2276) Order T-Shirt
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  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.

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  (978): Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane. http://tfl.nu/r200
  Replies (20) Good night (2786) Bad night (1323) Order T-Shirt
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  (210): View more from Texas

  He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now

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  (210): He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now http://tfl.nu/2tm5
  Replies (11) Good night (4307) Bad night (770) Order T-Shirt
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  (815): View more from Illinois

  we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.

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  (815): we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod. http://tfl.nu/j49l
  Replies (7) Good night (2906) Bad night (952) Order T-Shirt
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  (416): View more from Toronto

  I just googled if crying burns calories

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  (416): I just googled if crying burns calories http://tfl.nu/qfsf
  Replies (14) Good night (922) Bad night (3312) Order T-Shirt
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  (918): View more from Oklahoma

  I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.

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  (918): I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing. http://tfl.nu/z0n7
  Replies (49) Good night (1315) Bad night (3447) Order T-Shirt
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  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.

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  (508): we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos. http://tfl.nu/o4i1
  Replies (25) Good night (3217) Bad night (797) Order T-Shirt
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  (310): View more from California

  Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?

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  (310): Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on? http://tfl.nu/pffh
  Replies (54) Good night (9893) Bad night (867) Order T-Shirt
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  (321): View more from Florida Space Coast

  I'm drinking with 3 chicks and 1 gay dude. 100% chance I'm getting laid and 75% chance I'll enjoy it.

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  (321): I'm drinking with 3 chicks and 1 gay dude. 100% chance I'm getting laid and 75% chance I'll enjoy it. http://tfl.nu/0ggm
  Replies (37) Good night (13189) Bad night (1071) Order T-Shirt