Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
Randomize