I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
I queefed so loud it echoed.
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
Nooo, I ran into two if my exes, both having their engagement parties at the bar. It was like a fucking Eskimo family reunion, but with more tequila.
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
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