When she said "surprise me" I'm positive she didn't mean "bang my roommate"
Prob not but she was surprised
How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
I woke up to Dragon Ball Z playing in Portuguese and a donut shish-kebab~ed on a dick in my face.
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
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